First, I think I owe the cleanse an apology. Even after eating a ton of carbs last night, I woke up this morning feeling pretty awful. I think it’s allergies, but it’s hitting me HARD. I felt worn out, headachey, and a little nauseous all morning. Given that knowledge, there’s a fair to middling chance I’ll give the cleanse another try in a few days.
I slept in this morning, but I was determined to get a run in today, so I headed out this afternoon for my first outdoor run in a LONG time. Physically, I felt a TON better… for about an hour, before returning to my pre-run grossness.
Mentally, though? Y’all…
I feel like a TOTAL failure today. I went out for a 28 minute run, per the C25K schedule. I spent a while finding a flat route and walked the five minute warmup. I started running and felt pretty good, but almost immediately notice my breathing getting much too hard. I tried to slow down as much as I could and focus on my breathing, but it just got harder and harder. Granted, it was 91 degrees and 76% humidity… so I imagine that had a lot to do with it.
In the end, I ran 26 of the 28 scheduled minutes, but not more than 6 minutes at a time. I feel like a complete failure. I feel like the 25 minutes I’ve run over and over again on the treadmill mean nothing now.
Honestly, I’m panicking a little bit. I feel like I’ve totally overestimated my abilities and my achievements, like I don’t deserve any of the pride I’ve only just claimed.
I’m sad. I’m frustrated. I’m cranky.